Obama Brings Sexy Back

  • 20 comments

Barack Obama was in town last Friday. Like most places Obama has been at, his rally sold out quickly. On Craigslist, people were offering basketball tickets, cash, and their spouses for Obama tickets, which were actually free to the 12,000+ people who were lucky enough to get the tickets. You would think by all the excitement Obama was generating, he was bringing sexy back instead of talking about politics.

Barack Obama Bringing Sexy Back

It’s very rare for a presidential candidate to campaign in Oregon during the primaries. In fact, the last time it happened, George Washington was running for president. Candidates don’t like to campaign in Oregon for a couple reasons. First, our state is so small that we have only half a delegate to offer. The other reason is because we hold our primary very late in the year — usually the day after the presidential election in November. And we do that for a good reason. We Oregonians lack good judgement and we couldn’t live with ourselves if we screwed up the primaries for the rest of the country.

It’s true. Oregonians make bad decisions. Here are a few examples. First, there’s Tonya Harding, the Olympic ice skater. She thought she could win the gold medal by breaking Nancy Kerrigan’s leg. There’s also Monica Lewinsky. She isn’t a real Oregonian, but she did graduate from a college in the Portland area. She was obviously infected with our bad judgement disease when she gave President Clinton x-rated benefits.

Then there’s the Portland Trail Blazers, our professional basketball team. Most of you have heard of Michael Jordan, but how many of you have heard of Sam Bowie? Bowie was the player the Blazers selected instead Jordan. Jordan became a superstar while Bowie missed two seasons because he broke his leg. Bowie also missed two entire seasons in college for a similar injury. See, not bad luck. Just poor decision making by Oregonians.

Have I mentioned that Oregonians also voted for the loser in the last two presidential elections? We just can’t get anything right. Don’t trust us.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinterestlinkedintumblrmail

20 thoughts on “Obama Brings Sexy Back

  1. I can totally see Obama in a JT video promoting his bid during the general election. I bet he’s got some moves. They let Oregon have delegates now? When did that happen?;) Great post – clicked over from Dads.Alltop. -Jeremy @ Discovering Dad

  2. I have seen quite a bit of this man on TV here in Oz. Seems like he is making quite a show for himself…

    I’m with you…time he brought sexy back but LMAO…

    Love it !

  3. You want to see a state that cannot elect competent officials? Look at Arizona; we have a habit of electing governors who later are convicted of federal crimes and congressmen who are indicted for real estate fraud.

  4. The cool thing is that by courting Oregon he’s currently ignoring Pennsylvania. We’re so excited we actually get to vote in a primary this year. Some of us had to be told what a primary election was.

    1. How about everyone vote on the same day? You know, like the presidential elections. Or take turns voting first. Oregon’s primary is May 20th. Even this year, we still might not matter.

  5. I used to think I had a decent understanding of our election process, but this year, I’m totally confused with all the primaries and votes not counting and states that voted anyway, even though it wouldn’t count and I’m just all, “Wha?”

    We had our vote in Ohio. Does it count? Who knows.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *