Why I Should Not Cook
Once upon a time, I actually made meals from scratch. It was part of my wooing package. Since I am married now and no longer wooing, I rarely make dinner from scratch anymore. Now I cook food that comes out of a box, can, or bag. Just follow the daddy-proof directions and dinner is ready in 10 to 30 minutes. You ladies out there can stop booing now. I still love my wife. I just don’t cook as well as my wife (she even laughs at me when I cook)…plus cooking wasn’t specified in our marriage contract.
This past weekend, we actually made pizza from scratch. My wife isn’t fond of the tomato paste in pizza so I decided to make a California Pizza using a recipe I found on the web. The first order of business was to go to the store and buy the ingredients for the pizza. I don’t like grocery shopping and that’s another reason why I don’t make meals from scratch. Even worst is looking for items that you have never purchased before (what in the world is coarse salt?). [Important tip: don't drink two cups of coffee and three million gallons of water before you go grocery shopping. Doing so can make an unpleasant experience even more unpleasant. Trust me.]
The recipe for the dough didn’t look like anything special. So I decided to buy pre-made pizza dough, which costs less than a dollar. If I had made my own dough, the cost of the two packets of yeast needed would have been 66 cents. So the pre-made pizza dough was only 33 cents more and it saved me a lot of time and work. BTW, did I mention you shouldn’t drink a lot of water before going shopping?
The recipe was fairly straightforward. However, I had problems making the pesto sauce. It was a struggle with our toy blender and it took 30 minutes to make the sauce. Every minute, I had to stick a chopstick in the blender to uncompact the chopped basil leaves (yes, I turned off the blender first). So, if you don’t have a good blender, food processor, or chopsticks, consider purchasing pre-made pesto sauce.
Instead of shaping the dough into a rectangle or circle (like a normal person would do), I used cookie cutters to make butterflies, dragonflies, frogs, bears, hearts, and stars. And they actually looked as intended until we added the sauce, cheese, and toppings. After we baked it, the pizza looked like something from a Dr. Seuss book. The pizza did not look good at all. I should have stuck with a rectangle or circle shape. However, my wife and I thought the barf pizza was very tasty. Mommy Forever actually wants me to make it again (without the cookie cutters). The kids, on the other hand, didn’t like the pesto sauce, so they had leftover corndogs instead. See. I spend a lot of time making the kids something special, and they end up eating leftovers.
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You get points for creativity and taste!!
Still a fun family activity nevertheless.
Too funny!
Keep smilin!
Their little aprons are so cute! I think it’s great you cook at all! I can hardly get my Ken to grill, and I think grilling is Man’s work!
“It was part of my wooing package.”
You crack me up.
I think the pizzas looked really cool! It’s like modern art…like a Picasso pizza or something. Groundbreaking pizza development, if you ask me!
I like the pizzas, and as mentioned previously, you got the kids involved, so that makes it worthwhile. Kids have peculiar taste in food for the most part, so I wouldn’t consider it a failure.
Besides, in my house when the kids don’t like something, hubby and I say, “Great! More for us!”
Yum, pesto pizza sounds good. They may not have like it, but it looks like they had fun helping, and that, my friend, is what’s important. And what is it with men and grocery stores anyway?
Way to go! A cooking daddy. My husband runs from the kitchen, though, he does do all of the grilling. Pesto pizza sounds yummy.
Sometimes I take canned bisquits and flatten them out to make the pizza crusts. Then everybody gets a few and can top them however they want to. Lots of fun for the kids, kinda fun for you.
You made pizza with your kids! Way to go Daddy Forever! Mommy Forever must be reminiscing about the good ol’ days as she eats your pizza made with love! *are your goosebumps up yet?* That aside, yeah, what is it with men and grocery stores?
You sound like my husband. Doesn’t cook either. When he does, he makes these vile concoctions that really aren’t meant for human consumption!
I think he would do the same thing with the pizza and the cookie cutters.
Nice that you got the kids in on the helping!