My Kids are not Related

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I have three young children. They are all different. Yes, yes, yes, I know they are supposed to be different. But I didn’t expect the differences to be so pronounced at such an early age (Princess M’s 5, Spiderboy’s 2, and Baby K’s 9 months). I thought their behavior and personality would diverge over time. Apparently they are programmed differently from birth. Here are some examples of their differences:

Crawling and Walking
Princess M didn’t start crawling until she was almost one. Actually, Princess M didn’t crawl. She pulled herself forward with her hands. Luckily, Princess M went from “crawling” to walking in less than two months. Spiderboy started crawling when he was about six months old. Spiderboy could really crawl. He crawled all over the place and he could crawl fast. He was so good at moving around that he had no incentive to walk. He didn’t start walking until seven months later. Baby K started crawling at about eight months. But she doesn’t crawl on her hands and knees. She walks on all four like an animal (her butt sticks up in the air because her arms are shorter than her legs). When she wears her spotted orange shorts, Baby K looks like a leopard. She can stand up, but can’t walk yet (walking on all four does not count).

The Clingy Thing
Until the age of four, Princess M was very clingy. When I took her to the park or to birthday parties, she would cling to me. She didn’t want to play with the other kids. She just wanted me to hold her. Spiderboy, on the other hand, plays by himself at the park and runs around with the other kids at parties. I think Princess M was very clingy because she was the first and only child in our home until Spiderboy was born three years later. Right now, Baby K is very clingy with her mommy because of the breast-feeding thing.

The Night Thing
When Princess M was one and until she turned three, Princess M wanted me during the day. When my wife goes into the garage or laundry room, Princess M would make her escape and run upstairs to my home office. I could hear her coming a mile away. But at night, my daughter always wanted mommy. Even now when Princess M wakes up during the night, she wants mommy. She’ll come into our bed and snuggle with mommy. Spiderboy wants me day and night. He gets upset when mommy tucks him in. When Spiderboy wakes up during the night, he comes looking for me. That’s another difference. Spiderboy wants me to go back to his room to tuck him back in. Princess M doesn’t want to go back to her room; she wants to sleep in the master bedroom. I thought I was the master, but apparently Princess M is the master.

Spiderboy is tough. When he was two, he cut his foot on the vent but he didn’t tell anyone. Then we noticed there was blood on the carpet all over the house. We followed the trail and it led to Spiderboy. He was just lying in bed with the sheets covering his bloody foot. There’s more. Two months before his second birthday, Spiderboy broke his collarbone falling down the stairs. Two days later he was running around, jumping, and giving me heart attacks. If it wasn’t for his dangling right arm, you wouldn’t even had known he had a broken collarbone. Princess M on the other hand is not tough. If she was a boy, she would be called a sissy. One little bump could cause her to cry. Once I took her to the water fountain where kids played on hot days. Five minutes later, she wanted to go home because a boy bumped her.

Princess M appears to be the smart one in the family. By the time she was two, she knew her abc’s and could spell her name, my name, and daddy. She spoke clearly and could put together compound sentences (“daddy, you can kiss me, but you can’t tickle me”). Spiderboy knows his abc’s too, but he doesn’t know d through z. He can speak, but sometimes I have a hard time understanding what he’s trying to say. He turns three next month and I’m a little worry about him.

The Eating Thing
Spiderboy and Baby K are big eaters. They eat a lot. Sometimes, Baby K and Spiderboy (when he was a baby) would eat so much that they would throw up. Princess M didn’t like eating. Even now, she only eats junk food well. Baby K has a little pot belly, Spiderboy has chubby cheeks, but Princess M looks like someone stuck a little girl’s head on a body made out of tooth picks.

There are more differences, but this post is getting to be a bit on the long side. I might post a second part to this article in the future.


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